Colorado Avalanche Will be the First Team to Twenty Losses

We’re at a point in the season when a lot of teams are reaching twenty wins rather quickly; the Colorado Avalanche will be the first team to reach twenty losses.

There are currently seven teams that have 20 wins this season; the Colorado Avalanche are obviously not one of those teams.

However, they will most certainly be the first team to make it in the opposite direction, and smack 20 losses to the board.

Now, it’s going to be a tight race because the Arizona Coyotes and Winnipeg Jets each have 17 losses this season. It’s one of those races that’s likely to go down to the wire, neck-and-neck. So exciting!

However, I’m like 99 percent positive the Avs will make it there first.

Even if they somehow beat the Toronto Maple Leafs at home on Thursday night, they will most certainly get trounced by the Chicago Blackhawks in the United Center on Friday night.

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Remember, the Avs have the worst home record in the entire league, and they are on a seven game losing streak at home. So, the Leafs become a long shot. Meanwhile, the Chicago Blackhawks have the third best home record in the league, so…good luck in other words.

Wait, am I supposed to be optimistic? Nope…

The Maple Leafs

While the Maple Leafs haven’t been amazing this season, they are certainly a far cry from where they were last season. They are on pace for 82 points this season, a marked improvement over their 69 point total last season.

The Avs are on pace for 61 points this season…

The Maple Leafs should certainly be a story of inspiration for the Avs:

Fortunately for the Avs, the Maple Leafs do not have the best road record. Oh, and Semyon Varlamov could always just stand on his head again like he did in the first game against the Leafs this season. Also, the Maple Leafs are the last team the Avalanche were able to beat, so there’s that.

Maybe there is hope on Thursday night that the 20 losses mark will be shelved, but that hope will dwindle into a pinprick on Friday night.

The Blackhawks

Every year! Every year this team is good, every year they fill OUR stadium with red and are louder than we are. Every year!

Fortunately, the Avs don’t have to worry about a matchup against the ‘Hawks in the Pepsi Center. That’s always just an embarrassing affair, even if the Avs win.

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However, they will unfortunately be playing the ‘Hawks in the United Center.

That’s like going into a slaughterhouse and expecting to make it out alive if you’re cattle. And, the Avs may as well be cattle right now. They are the most passionless, uninterested, and boring team to watch in the NHL, kind of like watching cattle make cud.

And, there’s no chance of seeing them become the world’s only known species of carnivorous bovine, they just don’t have the killer instinct. So, go ahead and lead yourselves to slaughter.

More From Mile High Sticking: What’s Oh So Wrong with the Avs?

Ok, rant over.

Anyway, the Blackhawks are sure to hand the Avs their twentieth loss if they somehow don’t receive it at home on Thursday night.

Conclusion

Every now and then, the vents must be opened. Writing is pretty cathartic as far as that is concerned.

And anyway, what else is there to resort to when you’re team has gone 8-18-1 since starting 3-1. And especially when they’ve lost the last seven at home, and only won two games out of their past 13.

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So, forgive me for hoping that they win the race to twenty losses, but this season is a bust and the more they lose, the better the offseason becomes.

I’ll be at the game on Thursday night because I enjoy masochistic public forms of torture I suppose. Hopefully I am in for a treat.

Puck drop is at 7:00 pm MST in the final home game before the holiday break.